If there's one thing I can count on in life, it's PMS's uncanny ability to turn me into an overly-defensive, depressive, lazy, bloated, zit-faced blob of self-loathing. Every time, without fail. Add to that a week of never ending rain, an insanely active, slightly deranged 3-year-old, and a screeching, whining, teething one-year-old and you've got me ready to run out the door at the slightest suggestion of a babysitter, without looking back and probably in my pajamas, since that seems to be what I live in these days. And isn't it such a cruel fact of parenthood that when you aren't on your game and are feeling grumpy or impatient or like you just want to be ALONE, kids never fail to mirror that shit right back on you. Mom's grumpy? Well, look out, 'cause little Mr. Three Years Old can do grumpy too and when he does grumpy it is raw and uninhibited and full of screaming and kicking and heart-piercing exclamations like, "I don't love you, Mom!" Because, hell, he's three and that's how he rolls. And since I'M the adult, I'M the one who has to be all mature and go meditate or something to get my shit together and turn the mood of the whole damn house around. And WHY is that so hard to do sometimes, WHY??
I hate the helpless feeling that PMS gives me. It takes me by surprise every single time, even though you'd think I'd be used to it by now, and there is nothing that really seems to make it better. Exercise helps. A little. But only for a short period of time and I think it has more to do with the fact that I'm alone than it does with endorphins. Why do women have to put up with this shit? I've had my two kids; I'm done. Isn't there some form I can fill out, sign and date at the bottom, that will magically make Aunt Flo hit the road permanently and take those damn hormone fluctuations with her?
Seriously, someone should invent that.
You could try those birth control pills that don't have the "sugar" pills in the 4th week, and you never have a period. There can be some other side effects, but one benefit is that taking BC pills decreases your risk of ovarian cancer by something like 35%. Considering how difficult to detect and deadly ovarian cancer is, that is a good thing. Just a thought...
ReplyDeleteYeah, but taking birth control pills just adds MORE hormones into the mix. I tend to feel better when I'm not taking them, except of course for that one hellish week each month. I think it's just something I need to deal with. It's not QUITE as bad when the weather is nice.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I realize I sound quite dramatic in this post. It's based on truth, but I was also just trying to be funny, perhaps unsuccessfully. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI thought it was funny Al. I could empathize...this week for me too!
ReplyDeleteThis hit home with me. I still can't get over the fact that we still have to deal with menopause after everything you mentioned above is over. Great.
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